Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Tim McCarver Sings?

Proving he has an additional way to pulverize your ears, former baseball player and current baseball announcer, Tim McCarver put out a CD recently. Apparently he sings lounge songs that will make any animal within a 30 foot radius of the music cringe in fear. I suppose there are two ways to go with this blog entry - "Things I'd Rather Do Than Listen to the New McCarver CD" or "Fictional Titles to Songs on the New McCarver CD." I think I'll opt for the latter this time:

"I'm Singing You Something You Already Know"
"I As Good At Crooning As I Am Announcing"
"I Heart St. Louis"
"Nobody Likes Me, Everybody Hates Me (I Guess I'll Go Eat Worms)"
"Who's Idea Was Scooter The Talking Baseball?"
"Wouldn't It Be Funny If We Were Lovers?" (feat. Joe Buck)
"The Thong Song" (I imagine this one being sung in Will Ferrell's Robert Goulet fashion)
"Put Me In Producer, I'm Ready To Announce Today"
"It Hurts Me When You Mute The TV"
"I Make My Living At The Viewers' Expense"
"Bring The Noise, Bring My Voice"
"Why Are Nelly And The Dude From The Backstreet Boys In The All StarCelebrity Softball Game?" (Ok, this probably isn't a song, but I'm watching that right now, and wondering that very question.)
"I Enjoy Ears That Bleed"
"You Have No Choice But To Listen"
and finally "Jeremy" (by Pearl Jam- now, that would be ridiculous!)

I hate Tim McCarver, and him selling his CD for $15 a pop is absolutely a slap in the face to musicians everywhere that are struggling to get their work out to the masses. Stick to your day job, McCarver! On second though, don't do that either...


GMoney said...

I assume that his lyrics would be redundant and obvious as well. Like this:

"The reason that Joe Torre is going to the mound is that he has something to say to his pitcher."

Anonymous said...

Love this