Tuesday, August 11, 2009

The Heavyweight Champion of Nagging

I had to pass this story along. Check the link HERE. In what has to be the greatest story of marital bliss, a Chinese man jumped overboard to get away from his wife's nagging. As the story states:

The Chinese lorry driver, known as Zhou, and his wife were on a ferry on the Yangtze River when it all became too much for him, the Chongqing Evening Post reports.

Members of the ship's crew saw the man suddenly run out of his cabin with his hands covering his ears, and shouting: "I can't stand it any longer."

Awesome. This is the ultimate act of realizing all spouses' empty threats for hundreds of years. One could easily say they would rather jump off a boat than listen to the nagging, but to actually do it is amazing!

Also, this guy is only a lorry driver, yet he only has one name? Zhou. In the US and Europe you have to be pretty damn famous to have one name. Cher. Prince. Sting. Carrot-top. Yet this guy is a lorry driver and is known as Zhou. Hell, I'll give it to him now. He's now the most famous man (that I know of) to willingly jump off the side of a boat.

"While we were still puzzling over the this, his wife ran up and continued nagging him," said a crewmate.

"The husband covered his ears again and said: 'I need a break' before jumping over the side into the rushing river.

Initially when I read this I had a visual of him jumping first, and then having his wife nagging him while he was actually in the dark, treacherous water. After re-reading it, that appears to not be the case- but oh, how I wish it was. What could she possibly say to him after he flung himself over the edge of the boat?

"Oh, there you go again! Always taking the easy way out!"

"That is so like you! Always jumping overboard when I'm talking to you!"

"Don't even think you're coming home without the 2% milk! I only drink 2%, you lazy good-for-nothing!"

"I have a good mind to throw myself overboard as well, and when we both die, I will nag you in hell!"

The ending is a happy one. Just-Zhou was eventually found by the police after he swam over a mile across the river. His quote upon being found was:

"I felt I was dying, but even that's better than my wife's nagging," he reportedly told the police.

I have rarely seen better stories than this one.


Rae said...

what the hell kind of post is this from a betrothed man?!?

Tony B. said...

Haha! It has nothing to do with my own situation! C'mon- you don't think this is funny? I know you of all people can appreciate finding hilarity in others' ridiculous actions- yes?

GMoney said...

I was hoping that those waters were shark-infested. Or at least ill-tempered sea bass.

Tony B. said...

The story was set in China not San Diego!