Thursday, January 20, 2011

Thank You Notes

I seriously did not think that Jimmy Fallon hosting a late night show about be a good idea when it was first proposed.  He was somewhat funny on Saturday Night Live, but I found myself laughing at him more than with him due to him cracking up during every sketch he was ever involved.  Mrs. B. began DVR'ing the show in standard definition (to save space for good shows that need HD) a few months ago.  I'd catch clips here and there and eventually I became a fan.  More than ever, Jimmy has hit his stride as a late night host and his show is actually (can't believe I'm writing this) great!  No joke.  Two nights ago they had a bit about the 60 year old stripper that was fired for being too old.  In the monologue, Jimmy made the joke then danced a psuedo-Charleston to old-timey music to mimic the old stripper who he referred to as Mildred.  The joke popped up later while making fun of Myspace.  I know my description of this whole thing as not as funny in print, but it was a fine example of Jimmy and his crew bringing solid material to late night.  Also, the Roots destroy every night on his show.  They rock.  They are funny.  They are awesome. 

So, I stole this Thank You Note idea that Jimmy does every Friday.  At first I thought it was Jimmy's only funny skit- now I'm giving him serious "props" for the show as a whole.  He and Conan are the only watchable late night shows- and that is a fact. 

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Dear Milton Bradley,

Thank you for threatening a woman in Southern California and getting arrested on felony charges.  I really hope you go to jail so you can no longer disgrace the baseball diamond year after year after year.  For being a millionaire who works for other richer millionaires, one would think you could get diagnosed with bi-polar and get on some medication.  Oh well, I'm not here to play Dr. Tony, I'm just a regular guy who is sick of your temper tantrums and underachieving on the ball field.

Happy Trails,
Tony B.

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Dear Skip Bayless,

Thank you for defending Jay Cutler this morning on First And Ten.  You said if you were starting a franchise, you would pick Cutler over Aaron Rodgers.  Yikes.  I'm sure you just double jinxed Cutler and the Bears for this Sunday.  I'm going to have to borrow Ronnie's mind condom... Out of all the media to give the Bears support, you're the last person I wanted on the bandwagon.

Confused,
Tony B.

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Dear Peppermill,

Thank you for existing and giving me a free room for Friday night.  I'll see everyone on the Craps table, plus I need to cash in my Denver Broncos under on wins for the season and immediately put it on the Bears.  It should be another fun trip!

Excited,
Tony B.

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Dear Carmelo Anthony,

Thank you for making me sick of you.  You weren't important before, and you still aren't.  I'm pretty much done with you unless you go to the Bulls- then I'll be forced to care.  Until then, you and your crazy wife can fully enjoy the drama. 

Lala is an awful name,
Tony B.

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Dear Chicago Sports Talk Radio,

Thank you for giving wild opinions in a think Midwestern accent.  I recently got an app on my iPhone that allows me to stream radio stations around the country and I of course gravitated toward your fine brand of entertainment.  Callers are crazy.  By either exclaiming that the Bears will win by 20 or yelling about how the Bears still are awful, it's- as Vanilla Ice would say- "to the extreme."  It really makes me appreciate the shows out here- especially the Damon Bruce Show on KNBR 1050.  He's actually a Bears/Cubs fan doing a Bay Area talk show which gives it quite a great balance. 

Rock on with your bad selves,
Tony B.

3 comments:

GMoney said...

Poochie the Rockin' Dog is also famous for taking things to the extreme.

Skip Bayless would be the worst GM ever. Regardless of how you feel about Rodgers, you can't honestly like Cutler and his penchant for throwing numerous interceptions and the fact that THIS YEAR was Jay's first winning season since HIGH SCHOOL.

For God's sake don't put money on the Bears. You are clearly just making a homer play. If you want to let it ride, I sort of like the Jets getting 3.5. Oh, and it never hurts to bet against the Cavs.

Tony B. said...

I agree with you on Skip. I was shocked that he said that and I think it was just to make viewers mad (that's all he wants to do.)

That's a great point- what are your picks for the weekend? Over/unders? NBA picks? Milton Bradley years in prison O/U?

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